Birthday Wishes

Mum: What would you like for your birthday Stan?


Stan: An Xbox


Mum: Anything else?


Stan: A broom stick that actually flies.


Mum: Anything else?


Stan: A mug, with a medium sized elephant in the bottom of it.


Mum: Anything else?


Stan: Two bikes, actually stuck together.


Mum: Hmmm.

Thespian

Stan: (Making large expressive gestures)

Dad: What are you doing Stan?

Stan: I'm channeling the bard.

Feline Faeces

Stan: Daddy, did you know, Cats bury their wee and poo so donkeys can't find them?