Membership

Stan: I'm tired. 


Mum: Join the club.


 Stanley: (Beginning to cry) I don't want to join the club.

Anatomy

Stan: Mum I've fallen on my back kidney and it's gone hard.


Mum: Pardon Stan?


Stan: Oh, we're ok, it's gone soft again now.

Subliminal Advertising

Stan: (running into the kitchen, singing at the top of his voice) Moonpig, dot cock.

Ask Stan a Question.

If you have a burning question you would like to ask Stan then please drop him an email to sostansays@gmail.com  We cannot guarantee a sensible answer, but we will endeavour to email you back with whatever wonders Stan says. If we think it's a good one we'll post it on here as well.

Regards

So Stan Says

And That's What I Think of You

Stan: This sweet's gone manky. You can have it Mum, because you're a minger.

Star Wars

Stan: I wish you hadn't called my sister Florence.


Dad: What should I have called her?


Stan: The Phantom Menace.

Goodnight

As Mum bent down to kiss Stan goodnight, he grimaced.


Stan: No, mummy, don't kiss me, just go downstairs.

Traduire parlez-vous français?

Mum: I still find it hard to believe that in this day and age some disadvantaged secondary school kids can't read and write properly, some can't even speak properly. 


Stan: Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept, huit, neuf, dix dix dix.